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Oh its bloody hell!

13 Jan 2007

Oh its bloody hell!

Today is day 6 for me! The hardest day by far! Im doing it with the help of patches and still i am fighting with myself right now as to whether all this is really worth it. Maybe Ive done all the damge, maybe its too late to repair, why not just smoke and be happier, rather than put myself through this HELL. My brain knows what i should do, Dont Give In. My moods are in the extreme, i cry, i get so cranky and i feel like this is never going to end. Then theres my insomnia i seem to be in bed alot but just cant get that sleep to come and of course the midnight heartburn that doesnt seem to leave me alone. Im giving up because im a 30yr old mother of 4 children who hate the smell of tobacco and because ive been smoking since i was 12yrs (gave up for every pregnancy) and i want to be around to see my kids married and i want to be a grandmother and because i dont want to die from smoking!! But its not easy and as long as i stay realistic i know I can get through this, Im a strong willed independant woman and i have a husband who is going through this same hell with me!

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